I often hear in general conversations that our phones are listening to us. This makes me curious: If we reverse this, how much do we listen to our phones?
Our phones, computers, tablets, and all things digital are interconnected. Be it through our emails, phone numbers, social media—everything is linked.
You pop into your search engine, type 'gift ideas', and suddenly your social media feed is full of discount online shops, big brand deals, days out, and much more. This is engaging, provides us with creative ideas, and even allows us to buy the best gift ever!
It brings great connections and helps businesses we didn't even know existed. We pop on our devices to book a trip away, and suddenly we are seeing all these little destination gems, allowing us to explore a world we might never have seen otherwise. It is pretty incredible how, at the tap of a few buttons, we can order the greatest gift or plan our next adventure.
Now, if we can focus for a moment on social media specifically: I began a small experiment at the start of this week. I went onto my social media and 'liked' a post featuring a mug bursting with colourful flowers and the words 'may your cup overflow with peace, love, and pure awesomeness today. ' By the end of the day, my feed began to show quotes about being lonely and taking small steps. By wednesday, 48 hours after I liked the original meme, I was seeing posts with words like 'toxic,' 'isolation,'and 'hate.'
I began to feel awful.
At times within my history, these memes seemed to speak directly to me this occured during challenging periods in my life. Yes, people can be cruel. Yes, I need to buy that beauty product to feel great. Yes, I can do this by myself; I don't need anyone in my life (yet I still felt lonely) the list goes on... and it did not make me feel good!
I invite you to look at what you are seeing on your own social media. The memes with celebrities in the background and quotes saying things such as 'toxic people will always play the victim, hold your ground!' what is this meme actually telling you? That you are surrounded by toxic people? That you are weak? That you are faultless? Depending on your current state of mind, these messages can influence how you interpret them. You like one that speaks to you or is relatable, and it feels like you are suddenly understood!
Sharing a meme with a negative twist can impact how you feel.
A couple of years ago, I was teaching a group of students. One of their assignments was to create a presentation on working with people who have either anxiety, depression, or an eating disorder. Three students who chose eating disorders did so because they could relate to the topic on a personal level. During their presentation, they shared their experience of searching for information and what started as seeking insight into professional support for eating disorders ended up with them finding memes like 'nothing tastes as good as thin feels' and 'Top 10 tips on how to lose weight fast' which included eating nothing but ice cubes and chewing gum for seven days!
These students were amazed at how easy is was to go down a rabbit hole. One even admitted to considering the 7-day ice cube challenge due to an upcoming wedding. My goodness, how scary! The memes had such an effect on them that they were considering doing it!
The power of an algorithm
I am not an expert in algorithms, but I do know that anything we search, like, watch, or read helps the algorithm tailor our feeds to what it thinks we want to see. This could be amazing, but I am seeing more and more content turning quite dark. Our devices are impacting our thoughts and feelings, and not always for the better. The quick spike in dopamine allows us to feel good. Teenagers and adults alike will connect through sharing funny videos, relatable videos that can create a sense of unity. (if you're older, like me, it can take you back to a time when you could get paid £250 for falling over on 'You've Been Framed')
There is a generation of teenagers that are learning quickly from their devices through memes, videos, and tiktoks. The changes in what they watch are so subtle that they can easily go unnoticed. It is easy to lose hours scrolling and watching videos, some make us laugh, some are informative and educational.
However, the question here is: What impact are all these memes, quotes, and videos having on your mental health?
Are you stuck in a cycle of re-reading similar posts about tough times in your life, allowing yourself to relive those difficult, sad emotions?
What benefits are you seeing?
I am not trying to preach or tell you that all social media memes and videos are bad—they are not. However, more social media groups are sharing increasingly toxic material, creating a short-term feeling of acceptance and understanding (from a meme!), resulting in a disconnect of natural human connection or resulting in a poor sense of self-worth.
In recent times, I have seen many young people in counselling, and social media always comes into the session conversation in some form. I've witnessed genuine panic, fear, anxiety, and dread that is linked directly to the way they engage with their peers on social media. If they miss sending a snapchat (resulting in a loss of streaks - snap chat streaks are continuous messages sent on a daily basis. these are often photos of random tables, floors, ceilings—just to keep the connection going) It never fails to amaze me - the sense of regret, anticipating a response or feeling ignored by peers, some of whom have never met each other is having a detrimental impact on their well-being. These streaks are often described as conversations, yet no words or actions are happening.
The sense of loss and anxiety our young people some adults are feeling is so great that it reduces their ability to function. I am seeing an increase in paranoia, a lack of self-worth, and the skill of communication decreasing.
It appears that more people are turning to social media and memes for comfort, to validate and influence how they feel. To me, that is a scary thought!
However, social media and memes are not going anywhere.
I would simply ask you to take a moment and really look at what you are reading and watching. Be mindful that human connection and communication will help support you. We can all recall a time that we could relate to what we read and watch online (the algorithm tells us so), but if you notice more toxic information than supportive and positive content, then perhaps it could be time to put yourself first and take a break.
I would like to add that there are some incredible support groups and common interest groups on social media that do bring people together. They provide a community feel and can prevent some people from feeling isolated.
JOANNA GILBERT
18/07/24
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